Gifts to the gods

Four individuals (a Christian, a US marine, a Jew, and a Muslim) enter a throne room where various gods sit upon their separate thrones behind a huge altar. Each man carries a dead body, recently deceased in the latest surge of numerous wars, and their job is to provide the fresh offerings to each individual’s respective god; thus, the god would provide mercury and bounty to those who worship under him. Piles of dead bodies litter over the great alter; so many, in fact, they spill over onto the floor in tremendous mounds before the altar and about the room.

The men stop in confusion and fear.

“Where do we put them?” wonders the Jew.

“I was just told to place my offering before the god with the beard,” said the Christian.

“They all have beards,” comments the Muslim.

The gods, their exchange disrupted by the approaching men, turn to frown down upon the four with ominous expressions.

“Well, what have you brought us?” questions a god, his thunderous voice booming around the enormous room.

The four men flinch. The Jew swallows hard.

“Fresh gifts,” he supplies.

The gods look over the offerings.

“More of the same,” one god mutters, turning away with disinterest.

“What do we do now?” whispers the Muslim.

“I don’t know about you guys,” says the marine “But I’m pretty sure the one over there with the white beard is Uncle Sam. I’m giving my offering to him.”

And he heads off with confidence.